I had soooooo many friends when I was going through my party years. I was off the wall, ready to go at a moments notice and willing to stay out all night and be your last minute drinking buddy.
Fast forward to now where I have a fiancé and an 18 month old child. And I have probably a list of 1-2 friends I could call if I needed to vent and that’s really pushing it. I can’t speak for all first time moms out there but when I found out i was pregnant i NEEDED that extra support system. When I had my daughter, life changed completely and life was hard. Moming is very very hard to do without a support system. I had my sister. And that was it. My mother is incapable of having a true meaningful conversation let alone give advice (Another future post topic). My sister was my guiding light when I needed someone to hear me cry on those rough colicky nights. I suffered from anxiety and post partum depression (still do) and those are things you can’t go through alone and I know a lot of first time mothers even mothers to multiples suffer in silence.
So my advice is this, if you have a friend that just had a baby…. And you think she’s feeling those baby blues….
Call her. Even if you’re not the type to reach out first.
Let her vent. Every FTM wants to vent and doesn’t want to make that first step to reach out because she knows you have a life, and she doesn’t want to burden you. Not being able to vent leads to post partum depression. (Know the warning signs).
A genuine “how are you doing?” Can go a very long way. And I don’t mean writing it on her Facebook wall or her latest Instagram picture, I am talking about real human interaction.
If you are her husband/ boyfriend you need to tell her she’s beautiful. Her body changed in ways you would never understand and when she looks in the mirror she might not recognize herself. She might feel unattractive, undeseriable, and ugly. She needs to know you still love her and find her attractive and that she’s your QUEEN.